Sunday, October 22, 2017

Secrets and Tips to a Long Lasting Relationship


I have learned somewhere from my readings that falling in love is easy but staying in love is not. Indeed, I can attest to that. My relationship with my fiancé, Bryan, is already in its 6th year. On our 3rd year, I needed to leave Negros and pursue a career in Manila. From then on, every day seems an ordeal. The experience makes me realize that long distance relationship is not for the faint-hearted. Loving someone from a distance takes so much courage, faith and dedication. 

So, you may ask the question: ‘What are our secrets in keeping a long lasting relationship?’ Let me tell you our story while I present to you some points that you may consider in keeping your relationship alive.



1. Open Communication
I learned to be expressive to my partner. I believe that I should let him know how I feel because if I would not, I will feel alone in the relationship. I share with him the challenges and triumphs at work.  I discuss our plans and how to go about them even if we are miles away. It is our habit to ask how each other’s day went. Having an open communication helped us to understand and become closer to each other.

2. Consistency
We will not last a day without a text or a call. Bryan has been so consistent in dealing with our relationship. During my first three years in Manila, I worked night shift. He served as my alarm clock. He used to call me an hour and a half before my shift to wake me up and chitchat even for a while. In the morning when I arrive in my boarding house, we talked during lunch time before he takes his nap. We have developed this routine. Though it has become a habit, we see to it that we are having fun and spending quality time even if  it is just over the phone. Even if he is very busy at work, he sees to it that he checks on me. I do the same too. There is not a day in our relationship that we have not communicated. I believe consistent communication is a key.

3. Thoughtfulness despite the distance.  
I am living alone, away from home for three years now. My parents as well as Bryan are in the Negros Province. Bryan is two hours away from my parents. One night, I was startled from my sleep when my mom sent a message informing me that Bryan visited them bringing ice cream, roasted chicken and fruits. At first I thought she was just kidding but it was true. It was the first of the many counts when Bryan visited my family even if I am not home. His thoughtfulness makes me love him even more each day.
  
4. Loving and kind words. Complimenting your partner with kind and loving words will foster a harmonious relationship. Fortunately, Bryan and I have not experienced intense quarrel with exchange of hurtful words as a result of emotional outburst. Yes, we inform each other if one has committed a mistake and discuss how it affects each one’s mood. We see to it that if we are in middle of an argument (over the phone, or face to face), we do not throw bad words or insulting words for we may regret it after the tension settles. We believe that any misunderstanding can be sorted out by mellow and peaceful discussion. 


5. Planning for the future together
On our 5th year, Bryan proposed. Months after I said YES, we decided to avail of a house and lot package in a subdivision. Our engagement has been running for more than one year now. Last August 2017, majority of the house construction has been completed. It is surreal observing a structure in front of us – the house (we call LN: Love Nest) is a concrete testimony that love can withstand despite the distance, differences or conflicts in schedule.


If you decide to spend your lifetime with someone you love, plan for it together. Planning is an essential factor of  successful relationship and from there, you can take the next actions one step at a time.

6. Keeping God in the center.  
Surviving each day of a long distance relationship is not a-walk-in-a-park. It is our faith in the Almighty that fuels our perseverance and dedication to continue loving each other despite all our flaws, trusting in our promises and working towards achieving a future together. Hold fast to His faithfulness, give your best to stay loyal and pray to overcome temptation. If a relationship has strong center, it will not fall.

While contemplating on all of these points, I suddenly smell something really good and soothing. I knew it! It is the scent of Del Forever Joy and Love Fabric Conditioner – long lasting soothing fragrance. I eventually heard a knock on my door. Ate Lina dropped by to deliver my fresh laundered clothes conditioned by Del Forever Joy and Love. Wow! No wonder why my inner goddess feels like walking in the middle of a paradise when I sniff on my newly laundered linens. Smells really good! This is because Del Forever Joy and Love now has 15x longer lasting bangooooo vs a regular detergent brand based on consumer test in Metro Manila. (I got this info when I visited their facebook page: facebook.com/delfabcon) 

Like Cheska and Doug Kramer, I will continue to make use of Del Forever Joy and Del Forever Love when we finally live in our house in Bacolod City. This power couple is my inspiration to have a happy, healthy family. My future kids’ clothes/garments will surely be so bango and make them more nakakagigil. Ooohh. I can’t wait!

Indeed, loving is not only a wonderful feeling but also a difficult decision to make. I always have the option to just walk away, free myself from loneliness of a long distance relationship BUT I chose to stay. I will stay.

We all have unique love stories and different circumstances. At the end of the day, we all need to love and feel loved. No matter what happens, do not give up on love.
No matter where you are in the world, continue to believe in the power of love. Keep Loving! 

Til next time,
Antonia

P.S. You might want to read the story of how we started our relationship:
Start of our Love Story (Part 1) 

Seeing our future Together (Part 2)
Reasons why I left my comfort zone  

Reactions:

20 comments:

  1. Such a great post. I agree that communication is one of the most important key to long lasting relationship

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  2. Amazing tips, I agree that God is definitely very important in a relationship

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  3. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  4. Nice Post. Thanks for Sharing this beautiful Tips.

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  5. Can’t agree with you more. Communication and respect is a must for a strong relationship

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    1. Yes, right. Respect - another key factor. 👌

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  6. Great tips! Being open, kind, vulnerable and keeping God at the center is the dream formula for sure!

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  7. How wonderful that you have been able to make difficult circumstances work for the two of you. I wish you a very happy future.

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    1. Thank you so much! We're planning for our wedding tentatively scheduled next year. Still tough choices and decisions to make since we are still in a long distance relationship. :)

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  8. I love these tips. Relationships take time but with these steps, it could work. Thank you for sharing!

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  9. All good advice. THank you for sharing your tips on love

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  10. So sweet and inspiring :)

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